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Showing posts with label Love Tips. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love Tips. Show all posts

FUN TIME: Top 5 Ideas for Your Summer Date

 People say that Spring symbolizes the new beginning, but Summers are the best time of the year to start a relationship online.


 

FUN TIME: Top 5 Ideas for Your Summer Date

 
Summer is the time when most singles want to have fun. For many people, that means dating someone of a different race to fulfill some of their fantasies.
 
However, finding like-minded black people to have fun isn’t always easy.
 
Because of that, online dating sites gain many new black members at that time of the year. Dark singles realize that joining a site where most african-american people are their potential matches is the simplest way to turn regular summer into the best summer of their lives. Black people who seek partners on such sites are famous for being spontaneous. They don’t want to plan the next 40 years of their lives.
 
All they want to do is meet other dark-skinned  singles or people of other races who know how to have fun.  Because of that, starting a relationship with black singles online doesn’t take a lot of effort. Everyone wants to have real fun during the summer, so they don’t spend too much time dating online. Instead of chatting for months, members meet in person to get the most of the summer. After meeting a people with dark skin online, everything becomes exciting, like at the beginning of any relationship. However, the date ideas we’ll list below are sure to make summer even better.
 
Romantic Picnic or Outdoor Movies
 
Feeding each other under the open sky full of stars is one of the most romantic activities interracial couples can do. That’s one of the best date ideas for any couple, regardless of their race. Finding a lonely spot in a park is the first step. That ensures a couple can exchange kisses without being worried someone will disturb their privacy. Of course, romantic picnics are great during the day, but the night is the time for romantics.
 
And for outdoor movies as well. Relaxing in the comfortable car, eating popcorn, and making out is the perfect summer date idea. If you live somewhere where drive-in movie theaters don't exist, you can always go to a regular outdoor cinema. Every town has one of those during summer.
 
Night Walk in Your City
 
Most people neglect the beauty of their cities. They miss a lot of opportunities for romantic dates. Walking around your town with your partner during the summer reveals the new face of the area. When you’re with someone who makes you happy, everything looks more beautiful than usual. Getting lost in the city center or exploring locations you don’t visit very often. Or walking by the sea or lake are all awesome romantic date ideas. Wherever you decide to walk, you won’t spend a lot of money. Night walks are free, so you don’t need to meet a black billionaire to spend romantic time together.
 
Your Own Ice-Cream Degustation
 
Eating ice cream with a black single you’ve met online isn’t the first thing that appears in your mind when you plan romantic dates. That’s a big mistake because tasting different flavors won’t just make your date better. It will be a great way to find more about your new partner too. According to the Guardian, most black people prefer butter pecan ice-cream flavor. One in 5 to be precise, so you can test that out and see if your new partner is average or special when it comes to that sweet treat. There is scientific proof that couples develop similarities in taste and smell during the relationship. The more time passes, the more similar their senses become. 
 
If you have 1% of scientists in you, that date won’t just be romantic. It will be the beginning of the research. Remember which flavors both of you liked and which flavors caused division. As your relationship keeps growing, you’ll notice that you’re becoming more like each other.
 
Coffee at Unusual Places
 
Millions of relationships started over a cup of coffee. That’s an ideal first-date beverage because it wakes couples up and makes them more communicative. Drinking coffee with someone you fancy anywhere is a good date, but doing that at some unusual place is even better. Then it is not just a cup of coffee; it becomes a date both of you will remember for a long time. Search the Internet for unusual bars in your area and take your partner there. Or even better, take coffee2go and go to your favorite unusual place. You can have privacy there and spend time alone with your black partner.
 
Visit an Outdoor Concert
 
Being part of the crowd at outdoor concerts is a unique feeling. The energy is always so good, regardless of the music type—the bigger the crowd, the better the experience. If you’re a fan of dance or electronic music, the two of you will feel like you’re the one with the rest of the people at a concert. If you decide to go to something romantic, you can dance slowly with your partner and feel like you’re the only couple there. In any case, get ready to be impressed by the dancing skills of your black partner, they simply have a rhythm running through their veins.
 
People say that Spring symbolizes the new beginning, but Summers are the best time of the year to start a relationship online. Activity on interracial dating sites is much higher during Summer, and everyone is open to new things. All the best date options are available then. Couples can do something different; but romantic every day. 
 
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OPINION: Why Do People Choose to Date Via a Dating Site?

Why Do People Choose to Date Via a Dating Site


 Are dating sites worth it? Let’s unpack this and why we believe you should embark on this romantic journey today. Who knows what sort of people you could discover? 

 
The age of online dating’s upon us, with so many rumors surrounding it, it’s easy to close yourself off and disregard it as an option. However, the limited negativity is focused on more than the rumors, while positive sides and benefits aren’t explored that well; that’s what we will talk about today. What can you actually gain from online dating? For one,  you can start broadening your romantic horizons at the forefront and gain an opportunity to network as a bonus. Online dating sites aren’t focused only on finding love; you can gain friends and find communities of like-minded singles. If you find yourself with desire, then why not join? You’d be surprised how many share your desires in the bedroom. The next step is meeting the love of your life thanks to the many different search algorithms, profile details, and matchmaking opportunities, which proves the difference between making a conscious choice to try to build a relationship with the partner of your type instead of simply flirting with the random (but beautiful) person you meet in real life. This is just the tip of the iceberg of online dating. There’s more to explore!

Dating Online is More Convenient
 
Yes, the “old-fashioned” way of finding love has its benefits; however, how realistic is it? Since everyone is online right now, everything we do is online or based around it. Subsequently, we must adapt our dating life to match this text-based, hyperlinked, advanced and digital way of life suitable for the 21st century. If you want to find romance, embracing online dating is the logical choice for a few reasons. Many believe that online dating is tacky or uncouth - those are people who have used the wrong site. There are different types, communities with varying goals and membership bases. To ensure you get the most out of online dating, decide what you want.
  • Am I ready for a serious commitment? Look for traditional dating sites where people seeking to marry gather.
  • What if I want fun and then get serious? Explore platforms dedicated to hookups and flirt with users seeking fun.
  • Maybe I want to explore my kinks, but I’m too shy to tell anyone in real life about it? Seek out fetish chat to share fantasies with people dreaming about the same things as you.
Questions you should be asking yourself to aid in the decision. Depending on which applies to you, most will change the type of dating site you need. If you want serious, you need to look for sites with a focus on communication, serious members, and maybe a more mature site? If you want fun and hookups, then a mainstream site will work. Especially if you want a quick hookup. For fun and then serious, you could potentially use a mixture of mainstream and niche. To date a selection of genders, you can explore a range of LGBTQ + dating sites! And of course, you can do it on the go, in bed or even in more private places using your phone, as most sites have either an app, or a mobile-friendly version.
 
Choose by Preference
 
The beauty of online dating is finding exactly what you want. Dating sites always offer advanced search features – meaning you can filter the singles you’re seeing by distance, height, weight, hobbies, or desire. Especially so on fetish dating sites. They love to make the niche possible and bring you, men/ women, with all kinds of bedroom wishes. Exciting, isn’t it? No more “making do” with a partner that doesn’t tick all of your boxes sounds perfect, and a lot of problems would be much easier to resolve if you could simply close the chat.
 
Online Dating Benefits?
 
Many social scientific studies conducted prove that relationships that start online, for one, are the most popular way people meet in modern society, and two,  have a stronger bond and healthier communication skills. When starting a romance online, you become reliant on things taken for granted face-to-face. Communication is key and making time for them throughout your day is vital. You must manage time to get to know them and decide if you’d like to take this further. Additionally, when dating in real life, set up by friends, or meet in the office, there’s added pressure for this to work, leading to poor judgment. With online dating, there’s a longer period before meeting for the bad qualities to show or for the connection to expose the floors. Meaning you’re less likely to waste time. Before wasting money on a date or getting others’ hopes up, you can call things off and move on!
 
Conclusion
 
Why should you choose a dating site? Because the bonds, friendships, and perfect relationships you can find there are beyond worth it! It can be daunting to jump into; if you’re new to dating, it will feel worse. However, the nerves pass and the excitement sets in quickly.
 
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9 SIMPLE WAYS TO UNDERSTAND YOUR MAN

9 SIMPLE WAYS TO UNDERSTAND YOUR MAN


 By Dr Becky Enenche

Men are the simplest specie I've ever handled in my life. No man is difficult, ignorance is what makes it difficult. If you want men to fall in love with you and your fiance/husband to treat you like the greatest treasure on earth, you must understand what makes a man a man, the right buttons to click and how to enjoy a sweet, blissful, heaven on earth marriage with him!


1. MEN HAVE FIRST LOVE

They are passionate about it and that is his work. A man must succeed. Not making progress in life is like being impotent, he feels castrated! You must understand this and give him space to succeed. This requires time, efforts, focus, sleepless nights. To demand he spend all his waking hours watching romantic movie with you is to turn him to a perpetual failure! Idle ladies who have nothing sensible doing with their lives except disturb their fiance at work per minute, per second to fill their empty life are a big turn off!


2. MEN HAVE EGO: 

He needs it to be the head of his home and succeed. You must distinguish between ego and pride. A man with a healthy ego will listen to you but firmly and lovingly let you know his final decision. A man with pride won't listen to you at all, snob you and treat you like trash!

A man with a healthy ego is not a dummy! Some women expect their men to take all their advice and follow all their instruction, that's not possible! He can't take everything. He will take the ones that makes sense and put aside the ones that will land you in trouble.

He is the head. You can't force your ideas on him, you can only advise, the final decision lies in his hand, shikennah!


3. MEN ARE MOVED BY SIGHT:

It's so amazing so many ladies are ignorant of this. Look, if you don't want that guy to have sex with you, COVER UP whenever you are with him. I don't understand how a sane Christian sister will go to her fiance's house with a mini skirt and your laps thrown apart right in front of him! You also wore a low neckline and each time you bend, your big mammalian glands are staring menacingly at him and you tell him not to...not to do what? I pity men honestly, the temptation they face daily, only the God of heaven Himself understands because women are refusing to understand!

In marriage, you must deliberately make your husband chase you around for sex, just one look at some wives, all the sexual desire the husband has flies right through the window! Stinking mouth, bushy armpit, torn underwear, ragged pant, smelling wrapper, etc, etc. Yet the man is surrounded by sweet smelling, well dressed, tantalizing, head swooning babes at work! You must keep packaging and re-packaging! Get transparent bra that pushes the central focus forward, jaw dropping lingerie, sex triggering perfumes and blow his imagination off as often as you can (this is strictly for the married).


4. MEN WANT PEACE OF MIND: 

Nagging, criticizing, shouting, yelling, abusing and cursing can destabilize a man, you should minimize it as much as possible in fact, stop it all together.

Some men hate coming home early because the troublesome wife will nag life out of him till late in the night! Once he wakes up, she repeats the cycle till he leaves home! Men like that usually end up with mistresses or second wives! Men run towards women who give them peace not shatter them to pieces!


5. MEN LIKE QUALITY FOOD:

Unless he didn't give you enough money or he likes it, concoction rice with ground pepper, onions, coconut oil and maggi is an insult to him! Watery stew that drops to his elbow while eating is a big bomb on his head! Egusi soup that looks as if garri is sprinkled over a pot of water is a big slap on his face! His money should reflect what you cook please! Maximize what you have, treat him like a king!


6. MEN LOVE TO BE PRAISED:

Candidly, I love praising men, praise of man is my natural territory! When I noticed it almost landed me in trouble as men kept giving the chase, I stopped it all together and focus on my husband.

If you are a man-praiser, you will never lack a man's love all your life! You will be pampered, loved and cherished! I've never met a single man who does not respond to praise!

Stingy, selfish, bitterly critical women who see nothing good in their men never have lasting marriages! Praise your husband silly! Appreciate his efforts in your life. Look out for his good qualities and his song in his ears daily!

I love praising my husband, it gives me deep pleasure doing so, he sure deserves it and he enjoys listening to it.


ALSO READ: Wisdom for relationships and Marriage


7. RESPECT HIM: 

Ladies who shout at their fiance, order him around and disgrace him in public because she has a masters degree in international marketing will stay a long long time as single before she finds an old man to marry! You must be humble if you want to be under any man's roof! Respect is the food of every man. Learn to respect your fiance, show honour to your husband. Saying "yes sir" when appropriate won't make you less of a woman! Learn how to talk to a man. Some women just don't know how to talk! Never correct him in public, don't send him on errand in front of his friends, stop making jest of him in front of the children, it's bad!!!


8. SUBMIT TO HIM:

God states it clearly, "wives, submit to your husbands." Submit your body and other things when he needs them. If you have any trouble with that, ask God, not me. Why was Abraham madly in love with Sarah? She didn't allow her exceptional beauty make her proud, she was a very submissive, respectful wife who called her husband "Lord."


9. SUPPORT: 

Men want women who can support whenever they need help. That is why lots of men are having affairs with colleagues at work because the colleague is eager to help when he needs it most while the one at home left him to handle his problems by himself. 

Why then did he get married? What is her role in his life as a HELPER?


10. MEN GO THROUGH SEASONS: 

The season of little, the season of managing, the season of abundance! No man wants a gold digger who runs away when he has challenges only to show up when he has made it and has millions flowing in his account!

Men are not difficult at all. These and more are what makes a man tick, thrive and enjoy the woman he has vowed to spend the rest of his life with. Can you he that kind of woman?

Do you have what it takes to make your husband happy and fulfilled? Think about it..


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3 Common Ways To Handle Jealousy In A Relationship

Ways To Handle Jealousy In A Relationship


Some people find it difficult to have romantic relationships because of commitment issues, however, some have found a way around it and this has given them lots of satisfaction and emotional stability.

The idea of an open or polyamorous relationship can be exciting for some people, it’s the giddy freedom of sleeping with whomever you want with the warm, fuzzy stability of your boo by your side.

However, as nice as you might find this, there is always a way for jealousy to creep in. Often, there is a need to have someone special to yourself alone. So even though you are liberal-minded enough to have an open relationship, as humans, jealousy is somewhere around the corner.

Below are some ways to handle jealousy in an open relationship:

Discuss
Communication is the foundation of any relationship and it is even more important when there are more than two people in a relationship. So if there is an issue, particularly jealousy, you need to talk it out. Learning where your jealousy stems from is easier said than done, but there is a reason why it is the first step. Your feelings are valid and deserve to be met with compassion and curiosity.

Re-establish Boundaries
Sometimes, your jealousy in an open or poly relationship isn’t just a matter of personal insecurities that should be addressed. It might be a matter of unclear boundaries. Maybe your partner is doing something in regard to their secondary relationship(s) that is bothering you. Talk to them about it and re-examine your current set of rules.

Have a Backup Plan
While you’re having the “re-establishing boundaries” talk, you can also revisit or come up with a backup plan. There are different things that might come up in an open relationship. You need to be ready for these eventualities by creating a backup plan. Your partner might fall in love with one of the flings, a fling might fall in love and go psycho. If you or your partner are prone to jealousy, this shift in relationship dynamics, that’s out of your control, can stir up some less-than-desirable feelings. Communicating and having a backup plan about this upfront can avoid heartache later on.

If you are very emotional or possessive, an open relationship might not be a good choice for you...

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6 SKILLS YOU SHOULD HAVE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE TO SUCCEED

 
6 SKILLS YOU SHOULD HAVE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE TO SUCCEED


*1) Communication Skills*

Not everyone that CAN talk knows HOW to talk, and not every one that CAN listen (possesses functional ears) knows HOW to listen. Some are good at talking, but bad at listening, some are bad at both, a few are good at both. You need a balance, you need to TALK TO and LISTEN TO your partner in the right way if your marriage will follow the right way.

*2) Forgiving Skills*

A Great marriage consists of 2 Great Forgivers.
As long as you married a human being, and you are a human being yourself, offense will come, you'll offend each other consciously and unconsciously. The ability to forgive offenses as they come (without seeking revenge) will save you and your partner heartaches and save your marriage from Malice and Bitterness.

*3) Apologizing Skills*

"I AM SORRY" Those three words can go a long way to salvage your marriage and cut short certain problems before they start and escalate.. You should be so good at apologizing that you can apologize even when you are not at fault just for peace to reign. Welcome to Marriage.

*4) Letting Go Skills*

It's not everything you see your partner do or hear them say that you react to. SOMETIMES you ignore as if you didn't see or hear. Don't let your wahala be like bicycle, easy to start.. Be good at Forbearing, you'll need this especially when dealing with your partners weaknesses (everybody has theirs).

*5) Having Fun Skills*

What is Marriage without Fun and Friendship?
Always squeezing your face like someone that is licking lime will not help anybody. Some Men, their wives can't even joke with them, wetin happen? It's Marriage, not Wrestling. Don't carry your age, class, status, anointing, achievements and enter your marriage space, become a friend and lover once you get home to your partner. Keep your TITLE in the office, otherwise your marriage will become a BATTLE.

*6) Selflessness Skills*

One of the challenges with Marriage is Selfish People. What will I gain? "If I give him a foot massage, what will he give me in return?" "If I wash the plates, what will she do?" Always keeping scores. Doing things to get things in return. Only doing things if you (will) get something in return, Don't make this your mentality.. 

Finding Someone To Marry


Relationship tips

RELATIONSHIP TIPS

The challenge I see a lot of the time is that young people are looking for the ideal man or woman. Your ideal husband or wife is already married, that is why some people fall in love with married people. 

A lot of the time, this guy or lady who looks perfect was not like that when he/she got married. If in your vision your husband is a CEO, can you recognize him when he is not yet a CEO? 


When Pastor Nike and I got married, we were not the way we are now. It has taken investment for us to get here. I have issues with guys who are turning bachelorhood into an institution, there are lots of people around town who are not getting married because they want to own a mansion, have some money and cars before they settle down, they already have a job and they are waiting to have an ideal financial situation before marriage, I am telling you, if you are in that situation, you have been deceived. 


What a lady needs is not a perfect man in the present, what she needs is a man who has a vision, a man who can define exactly where he is going and who he is going to be. That is what also defines the kind of wife you should marry. When Pastor Nike and I got engaged, when we were courting to be married, we discussed our salaries and I discovered that her allowance as a Youth Corper was more than my salary as a pastor. The day I told her my salary, I quickly told her, 'you know what? It's not going to be like this forever, I am going somewhere'. I described the future for her. 


The essence of leadership is having a vision and the capacity to communicate it. You should be able to sell your vision to a lady. As a lady if your accessment about a man is who the person is today, you will soon be Deceived because the fact that he has a car now is no guarantee that he will have a car in 5 years time. 

Making a choice for marriage is largely a matter of intuition. Some people, all they think about is the wedding day. After the wedding, what next ? Who is this person going to be? This is the  reason why your becoming matured is critical, your spiritual maturity is the key thing. Your greatest asset in finding someone to marry is your ability to hear from God. Nobody can accurately predict your future or guarantee what it will turn out to be except God. 

You need to grow spiritually and develop the ability to hear from God. Take time to pray, catch a vision from your future and then you can marry someone who loves you...

By Pastor Sam Adeyemi

#lovehubmedia🌍

5 Tips For Choosing A First Date Outfit

 

5 Tips For Choosing A First Date Outfit

Admittedly, dressing up for a first date can be nerve-racking considering you want to impress without looking like you are trying too hard.

So you are meeting that guy your friend introduced you to, or maybe it is the cute guy from the dating app you have been texting with.

Give yourself the boost of confidence you need for the first meet-up with a majorly hot outfit that will make you feel like a super babe.

Comfort Is Key
You don’t want to be caught fidgeting throughout your date. Keep your comfort in mind when picking out first date outfits. Don’t wear anything that you can’t walk in, eat-in, or breathe in! Comfort is key no matter what.

Choose Your Best Colours
It is best to dress in colours that you are often complimented on. Not only will you be comfortable, but you also don’t have to worry about whether you chose the right outfit.

Let The Location Be Your Guide
Always check out the location of where you have agreed to meet so that your outfit reflects the environment. You don’t want to be too warm in an environment that would have required you are light with your outfit.

Avoid Extremes
For a first date rule, avoid extremes like heavy makeup, overly trendy outfits, or showing too much skin. Natural and minimal is always best for the first date. Wear something that looks good on you, neither too tight nor too loose, just something that compliments your figure. For makeup, enhance your feature but don’t overwhelm it.

Be Your Best Self
Wear something that truly makes you feel like the best version of yourself. Because when you do that, you will have more confidence. And the more confidence you have, the more you will smile, the more you will engage and chances are, the more dates you’ll have!

5 Things You Should Know About Online Dating

 

Increasing numbers of people are utilizing online dating to find their romantic partners in the present day. They know that online dating gives them a chance to seek out the perfect match without having to put in a great deal of time and effort.


Still, there are some concepts about online romance that every person should understand before generating a profile. Keep these things in mind when you sign up, and you’ll see why dating in cyberspace is such an attractive idea to some.

You Can Communicate with a Few People at the Same Time
One great part about dating people using an app or site is that you can interact with a few people at a time. The chance to save time and still have a fair number of dates is a major portion of the appeal for online romance. Remember, when you’re on a site, you can send messages to people to learn more about them and respond in seconds. While it’s up to you how many people you’re involved with at a single time, you can easily manage 5 or 6 different people until you determine who you want to date for the long-term.

You Can Be Everywhere
Another element of online dating that people enjoy is that it fits neatly into the rest of your life. Using the internet as your source of dates means that you can check your messages, seek new partners, or have a date anytime and from any place. People have used their lunch breaks at work to have a date, and they’ve snuck away from a set of lifts at the gym to respond to a cute person that just messaged them. Dating allows you to be everywhere and still get the outcomes that will help you secure the sort of relationship you want.

Chatting 24/7
When you think about online dating, you have to realize that the vast majority of it is happening on smartphones. Many modern people depend on their mobile phones. They like to communicate with friends, relatives, and make new acquaintances online. For better or worse, using a smartphone as the means to communicate with potential romantic partners online gives you an ongoing availability. For most people, that means you can send a message any time of the day or night to get a response. This is a boon for people that work overnights or have a very restricted schedule for dating. Being able to date and chat whenever you want is also a key to never feeling lonely again!

You Can Be Yourself Online
When you think about most social media and dating in general, you should realize that the majority of people are putting up a front to portray themselves in the best possible light. When you date online, though, you can actually be yourself. There is no pressure to impress your friends and try to be the tough guy or bad girl in public. You can be the person you are on the inside without having to worry about what other people think of you. Online dating is very beneficial to those entering a new stage of their lives and who want to shed the former version of themselves. With that in mind, you should see the benefit of online dating is your local dating pool is full of people that knew the old you that you’re trying to leave behind.

It`s Easier to Attract Attention Online

You could stand in a crowded bar and say that you’re looking for a date, and you would probably be ignored. The dating scene in most in-person places is rather bleak in the best of times. Using an online dating site, you can help people find someone just like you. Modern services allow you to list everything from your height, weight, age, ethnicity, dating preferences, culture, religion, and far more. You can then flesh out your profile with information that makes you more appealing and shows people your personality. The person using the internal search feature on the app will have an easy time finding and messaging you. Instead of screaming into the void, you’ll have the ability to find people you like with ease and be found by those that would enjoy dating you.

Being a member of an online dating community is a great way to meet single people. There is no easier way to interact with a lot of people and maintain your personal life schedule. All you need is to find the site that gives you the best opportunity to meet the type of people you want and to get the dating styles you desire!
 

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Do All Newly-Weds Make Love On Their Wedding Night? Check Out What People Have To Say

 

Do All Newly-Weds Make Love On Their Wedding Night? Check Out What People Have To Say

According to a recent study, more than half of couples don’t manage to consummate their marriage on their wedding night.


wedding night

File photo

Read about couples talking about their wedding night in this Vanguard report.

***

Even those with a jaundiced view on matrimony still see the wedding night as something to look forward to. After months of planning and executing a wedding, you’re now alone with the spouse you vowed to spend the rest of your life with – starting with the wedding night.

And sex, what else rears its interesting head. But are things cut and dried? According to a recent study, more than half of couples don’t manage to consummate their marriage on their wedding night – with alcohol, stress, and exhaustion named as the top passion killers.

Mercy, a polytechnic lecturer was 23 and a fresh graduate when she got married to Elijah some 30 years ago.

“He never actually proposed”
, she explained, “so, I guess getting married was simply mutually agreed.  My parents saw it as a social suicide to openly `live in sin’ as some of our mates did.

“Planning the wedding just happened and my mother went into overdrive making plans for the wedding of her only child and the whole day was exhausting. It was a huge relief to arrive at a mutual friend’s family house in a nearby state for the only honeymoon we could afford.

“It was a huge company house and he and his wife had gone to a considerable extent to make the guest room very romantic. The clueless man had also arranged for a small welcoming party that night.

“Not one to miss an opportunity for past time drinking with his friends, Elijah cajoled me into the party venue – not to the marriage bed.  Eventually, after much imbibing, we hit the sack. `Well’, he leered, `I suppose we’d better consummate this marriage’.

“I told him, the room seemed to be spinning. I felt sick as I wasn’t used to drinking.  The feeling overwhelmed me. The bathroom was down the corridor, I ran as fast as I could, but I missed.

“I staggered back to the room, shaken and shame-faced.  `I’m sorry, I think I’ve messed up the corridor”, I told Elijah and passed out.  He spent what was left of our wedding night clearing up the corridor and cleaning me up. No wonder it didn’t last – we were divorced nine years later!”

Did we make love on our wedding night? “You bet we did!” hooted Ndidi cheekily. Married to David for 20 years with four children, she said: “I’d been counting off the minutes for months.

We were born again Christians, so we were virgins and had been waiting for the night with the keenest expectation.  My husband is an evangelist, and when we went for counselling before we got married, the Reverend had asked us why the need for marriage.

Apparently, he was expecting some pious answer such as `To help each other in Christian work’. We both immediately and unanimously replied, `Sex’. Why else would you get married?

“We were so excited about the prospect that wild horses wouldn’t have kept us away.  But my mother unwillingly scuppered our sneaking off in the afternoon for sex. We were to remain in the family house, in our room, for the few hours in between the easy church wedding and the reception.

“So she’d left us alone, hinting she fully expected my new husband to make the most of the time we had before the reception proper. I was so embarrassed at her even having these thoughts that I made very sure we didn’t.  Instead, I stayed in the living room with friends.

“I made sure my hair remained up and tidy, leaving my mother in no doubt whatsoever that it hadn’t been rumpled and tussled. At close to midnight, with the party still in full swing, we retired, sober and excited to our hotel room and enjoyed a night of madly-looked forward to – and extremely inexpert – lovemaking. It was worth the wait!


Tunji and Kate had been living together for a couple of years before they got married 30 years ago. “But did we consummate our new married status on our wedding night at one of the poshest hotels in the city? We did not.

In fact, to my enduring shame, we didn’t even retire to bed at the same time.  Kate was three months pregnant, her growing bump hidden by an empire line wedding dress.

Half-way through the reception, when the dancing proper began, she made her excuses. But I was still in the mood to hang out with my friends, whooping it up until my new sister-in-law politely but firmly told me that my place was upstairs with my new bride – not downstairs twirling other women around the dance floor.

“When I got to our room, there was just far too much to talk about, from what friends and relatives had worn, to how one or two of them behaved, to an assessment of the food and the drinks, the speeches. We were so happy everything went according to plan we just collapsed on the bed and fell asleep”.


You’re put on notice! (Humour)

The newly married couple returned home from their honeymoon and travelled down to the husband’s country mansion.  “We’ll take the pony, darling”, he said, “and then you can get a better view of our land.

However, they’d only travelled a mile when the pony began to get awkward and refused to cross over a small stream.  “Come on you bugler!” stormed the man and hit the pony a severe blow.  The animal moved slowly.

“Right, that’s one”, said the man. Ten minutes later, the pony stopped again.  The man got down and hit the animal with a piece of wood.  “Now get going”, he yelled. `That’s two’. But just as they came in sight of the house, the pony was startled by a flock of pigeons and refused to move.  No wonder how hard he was hit, he remained still.

“Right!” Screamed the man, enraged, “that’s three”.  And he took his hunting rifle from the back bag and shot the pony dead.  “Good heavens!” exclaimed the new bride. “How on earth could you be so cruel?  I feel as if I’m married to a monster!”  “Right.  That’s one”,  replied the husband.

***

Source: Vanguard